I thought I was being so clever, I thought I had the ultimate patronizing put down when a guy I met on a bus twice* in China and then exchanged the odd (completely platonic) email with out of the blue decided to profess his love for me (while seeming forgetting that he was supposed to have a fiancee). Didn't really know what to reply initially, but the messages first of reconfirmation and then apology started mounting up in the inbox, so I had the wonderful brainwave of saying to him that maybe I was mistaken what with the language barrier, but whatever point he was trying to make he should always remember that he is like my little overseas brother. Incidentally I couldn't use an exact translation, as 'little brother' is also a slang term for a certain part of the male anatomy.

Still, I quite liked the nice little condescending put down, drawing his attention to his tender years (about 23) yet in a friendly sounding package, and skillfully avoiding the whole declaration of love thing.

And now I get an email going on about how he's going to address me now I'm his big sister, and what this all means to him. That one rather backfired on me. Thank god continents divide us. He also added something about 'whatever I come across later when I'm back in China*, he'll always understand me'. Eh?

*It was very bizarrely coincidental that it happened twice like that, which is unfortunate as it means there is now 'yuanfen' (缘分, it's similar to fate) binding our paths together, like er, ape poo (猿粪 )

**presumptuousness on his part